I want to write about my new church. Thing is, it's not really my new church anymore, because this past Saturday was my 6 month Downtown Church anniversary. If you recall this post, I loved it from the beginning. It was upbeat and the worship team pwned and, the thing that got me most, people cared about knowing me.
Like I mentioned back in June, girls were coming up to me to meet me from the get go, something that didn't happen a single time when I was going to Immersion. And not only did they want to meet me, but they were immediately asking if I wanted to hang out with them. I was all like, "Whaaaaaa?" But they didn't stop.
So, three weeks in, a girl asked me if I'd want to get dinner at Uncle Wendell's BBQ, the best restaurant ever. Of course I agreed. So we went to dinner, and then she convinced me to go to her bible study come fall, and I did. And here you can see most of the Super Models, my bible study:
Yeah. I love those people to teensy bits and pieces. Every single one of them is amazing. They love the Lord like something crazy, and they build each other up and love each other, and the thing that baffles me the most is they actually like me. I don't say that to throw myself a pity party at all, but I'll be honest with you: I've never really had very many real friends. I had a lot of people I spent time with because they tolerated me, but it was usually short-lived and I couldn't escape the fact that it felt like many of my "friends" were really very self-centered about the relationship. If I had something to offer and if it was convenient, I was in. If those things weren't there, I was out.
I have yearned for authentic friendship and fellowship for years. Literally since like, junior high. I was sick of being taught that fellowship just meant Christians doing fun stuff together, and I was sick of trying to force friendships with people who frankly didn't even want to be around me a lot of the time, and I was sick of dealing with drama crap, and I was sick of shallow, half-hearted interactions that only occurred because someone was bored. I wanted something real, something where there was love and encouragement and depth. I wanted relationships where I could thrive, where I was loved and cared for, where the Lord was the center of everything and there was meaning and openness and realness.
Basically, in many forms by several people to varying extremes, I was told that those things were unattainable, that my expectations were too high, and that no one was that intense about their friendships. I was told that I would have to wait until I was in my thirties when everyone magically would get mature and deep like I apparently was. It wasn't going to happen. I was told and I started to believe that it would be years before I ever got even close to the kind of authentic friendship I desired, and that at the current time of my life it would never happen because no one is that serious, mature, loving, whatever.
That was a lie. I have that with these people. They love the Lord and each other the way I had always believed could happen. This is the Church.
I hope someday you all find people who love the Lord and who love each other this way, because they are quite possibly the greatest blessing in my life right now. This church is wonderful.
I love the Super Models. You guys are bomb.
Lovelovelovelove to all.