I play music a lot more now. Tons more. I love music.
Warning: Honesty moment.
No one gets it sometimes. No person does. You want to rely on someone, you want to trust and talk to someone who gets it, who gets you, who relates to you the way you need them to, who doesn't have an agenda or a selfishly-motivated opinion. But sometimes there isn't someone like that. So, then, you're told to go rely on God because he is all you need. True, he is. But let's face it. Relying on God is a lot of work. Sure, I want to rely on God, and I do, but if I want to hear from God it isn't like he just makes it plain, he makes me work for it. I have to think through everything and ask myself is this God speaking to me? or I have to sit and be still and basically pray that I get something concrete to hang on to. Sure, I'll talk to God, but hearing from him is freaking a lot of work.
That said, I still love God a lot. I just get impatient sometimes and I want everyone to be perfect. But it's all good.
That's the end.