I'm in love with things I can't define...

Have you ever prayed for something to be taken from you and then had it taken away like you asked, and then been so distracted by the fear of it returning that it was nearly impossible to be thankful or to rejoice that it was gone?

I had an interesting conversation (if you can even call it a conversation) with a friend today. The kid just astounds me how people can try so hard to reach out to him and to show him they care about him, and he refuses to recognize it or even care, and then believes that no one cares about him and so he has no reason to care about them. I just... I can't even begin to understand how someone can be so loved and still refuse to love. People love him. It's just true. He's hilarious, he's thoughtful, he's brilliant, but he wants to be able to do whatever he wants. Ugh. I just want him to understand.

Small group was good. Kind of hard though. Today has been a weird day for me.

Mara Tenille


  1. aYES! It annoys me to death when that happens, because I know that I ought to be spending more energy on gratitude, but I can't help worrying.

    Some people honestly never grasp things like that. They go on, declining to recognize that anyone can have any sort of valuable interest in them, etc. It's hard. I don't know what to say besides that prayer is more effective than logic.

    I'm sorry.

  2. MARA! (...I went...to Subway today! *wins*) Hey, sorry I haven't commented in a while-life, school- stuff. Even logic is never fully grasped, take for instance a highly special needs child who is everything logic and nothing emotional basicly- it pretty much needs a middle ground, and some people like to be in their one side and not get out of that rut.