Thank you, Hans. Yeah. I suppose you're right. I'm just tired of always wanting to bail out when things get hard or when they get uncomfortable, and of always wanting to stop trying when I don't see immediate results. I wish I had the drive to actually get something done. To start something and actually finish it for once. And not finish it because I have to, but because if I don't do it I will have quit yet again. I'm tired of wanting to quit. I'm tired of feeling lazy and stupid. I'm tired of giving up on what I want just because I have to work to get there. I'm tired of having dreams and not being willing to follow them. I'm just tired. Of everything. Of me. Because I don't have the guts to get off my butt and be who I want to be regardless of what it takes.
*sigh* Gosh, this is dumb.
Mara
Everyone wants to bail out when things get tough.
ReplyDeleteYou do have plenty of drive, I have seen it working.
Sometimes, when one feels like that, it's best to simply put one's head down and keep doing what one is.
But. That said, there are times when changes should be made, and when that happens, I find it's typically easier and more functional to start with small changes.
Pssh. It's not dumb.
I don't know if I'm making sense, or being helpful, if not, I'm terribly sorry.
Weird. I have to enter the word verification code twice, every time.